We had a sponsored design post today – scheduled for a few weeks. I just couldn’t put it up. I had “emotional life whiplash” this weekend – where you have to live your life with kids while also trying to stay present to the tragedies that are unfolding in real time. We went to Bend because the kids had two extra days off school and skied (or, in my case, “tried”). Every few hours I would pick up my phone and be reminded of the very clear, horrifying actions of our government on its own people. The back-and-forth was stark and unsettling. Maybe you can relate.

I have one of those personalities where I try to see most sides of most situations. I know that there is always context, nuance, and perspective that should be considered. I lean left, but I also understand that my bubble isn’t always right and that different communities, states, and groups of people have their own set of experiences that form their beliefs (and listening to others has helped shape and reshape mine). I know I don’t know everything and its impossible to understand all points of views. But this weekend hit harder than usual. Living in Portland, I knew the false narratives around immigrants here and the unnecessary “crackdown” by the government. We’ve never once felt any “negative effects” of having immigrants in our lives; in fact, our personal experience is the 100% opposite (which I recognize might not be everyone’s experience, but its ours). Everyone here together, sharing lives and cultures, is what makes living in the US so beautiful. But I’ve tried to understand that in many border states, government officials or the media portray a different experience. I also do believe that every news source is biased (because they are edited by humans… for now), so trying to feel confident about what you are reading is an absolute chore (I read a lot of news sources for this reason). But as ICE has escalated in Minnesota, it all became clearer than ever. The actual video evidence of Alex Pretti is inarguable. Watching the video over and over from different angles was horrifying and surreal. And our President’s and his government’s reaction was somehow worse.

So this is to my conservative readers. I genuinely want to understand if you think what is happening and how its happening is ok. I understand there will at times be casualties and accidents that are out of our control, but the volume of masked men, with barely any training, following brown people around town with guns, with zero accountability for their actions, surely can’t be what you wanted. I understand all the arguments about border control, I do. And I understand that Biden and Obama both deported a lot of people – millions more than Trump in his last term. It’s not about deportation as an idea; it’s how they are doing it. With such violence, cruelty, and a desire to almost torment and terrorize. Families being ripped apart who were in the midst of the immigration process. Children as bait. Moms and nurses killed due to untrained panic or maybe something more sinister. Most of the conservatives that I respect are being silent right now (*as of Sunday evening), likely scrambling to frame it in a way that is possibly aligned with their morals and political careers.

I know that America wanted change when they voted for Trump, and I accepted that desire as a criticism and referendum for how things were. It wasn’t the change that I wanted, but America spoke, and I really did try to listen. But this last year has been so damaging to democracy. In the big M macro way. I’m a huge history lover (it was my major in college), and America is a tiny blip in our world history, and it’s increasingly not looking good. There is no guarantee that we will be around in 200 years. America has only been this “experiment” for 250 years, but so many of our founding values have been challenged in this last year, and I really think that if we don’t get this guy out of power soon, we are in HUGE trouble. He’s playing by no rules, disregarding international protocol, let alone his own government’s laws on every front, with zero accountability because he has taken over every branch of government that could hold him accountable. While he’s not the only one to blame, I certainly think he’s the driving force… and I don’t think that most people would have voted for this version of him.

I guess the point of writing this is to hear from readers outside of my bubble. My hope is to hear from conservatives and republicans. I totally understand that there are things you hoped he would change and improve when he got back in office, but I genuinely want to know if you think that this is too far? The tariffs were/are troubling for our small business economy. The “being bought off by the tech billionaires in exchange for no regulation” is extremely problematic for our kids and economic futures. The cancellation of all the international aid felt cruel. I could go on… But seeing a city protest in a peaceful way, with people allowed to videotape and whistle at barely-trained masked men grabbing brown people off the streets, seeing a nurse trying to help a woman stand up and then being killed…it’s too much, too violent, too deadly.

It’s un-American. We are flawed with bureaucracy, run by people who are so imperfect and have a lot to learn. But our founders built our country to make us feel safe and free.

And right now, almost none of us do.

I’m a few weeks into my winter hibernation and have finally recovered from the holidays. My social battery is back to a normal level (shh, I’m still hibernating). This January, I had nothing to do at night but listen to audiobooks while I organized every. single. drawer, made soup after soup, eat healthy, walk/yoga, read juicy novels (or books on how to talk to our spiritual guides or be a better leader), and put on soooo many face, hair, and even feet masks. And you bet the sauna blanket and red light therapies were at the ready for TV binging. Today I’ll dive into the dumb but SO WORTHWHILE beauty stuff that makes me feel great (yes, even the cheap stuff). I run dry, especially after the cortisol highs and over-indulgence of the holidays. But you see, I have a philosophy that most masks, like most forms of exercise, are worth doing, and are even GREAT. Of course, some are “better” than others, have better ingredients, are more effective, blah blah, but honestly, they almost all improve your skin and make you feel better. The cheap ones still give that glow and, more importantly, give you that sense that you took care of yourself. I would even theorize that the act of simply setting aside the time away from others and rubbing it on your skin, face, and hair sends a happy signal to your brain – Hey brain, I care about this body.

It all starts with the bath…

I have bought so many fancy bath oils over the years (my favorite is still this Jo Malone, but it’s too expensive for day-to-day use), but since I bathe so much in the winter, I really only use Dr. Teals foaming bath in lavender ($11 for two bottles). It smells good, foams up so easily, and lasts for 20 baths (the whole month). I do NOT like any jars of garbage that leave weird flakes or residue in my bath that I then have to clean, and this one doesn’t (a side of “chores” with your relaxing??? No thank you.) Oh, and I do NOT like a rock in my bath, waiting for them to dissolve to “work”. I’ve got feelings.

I recently bought a huge jar of magnesium flakes (I bought it locally, but found it $9 less on dumb Amazon – GD you Amazon!!). It’s unscented, so you can combine the flakes with the bubble bath. There are soooooooo many oils, salts, and rubs out there. My suggestion is to stick to one scent you love because it tells your brain that it’s time to relax when you smell it (that Jo Malone scent will always remind me of lockdown, as I used it almost nightly then, so it has an odd nostalgia for me now). I don’t have a scrub that I can recommend, but in my experience, they all make your skin so soft, and the fancier ones are slightly better but go so fast.

After bath, I’ve been dry brushing and my goodness I LOVE it (I just learned how to do it properly). Now I dry brush right before bed, too (it’s so exhilarating). I already had the HigherDOSE drybrush, but was given it again by a friend who is super into this stuff because it’s her favorite as well (I’m sure a more affordable one like this would also work well). P.S. I don’t believe dry brushing like a normal person actually gets rid of cellulite (hello, marketing), but it’s a huge mood boost and stimulates your largest organ in such a fun way (I don’t doubt that it does good things for your lymphatic system, but just get annoyed with slogans like that). And then I’ve been putting on this body butter that was gifted to me from Kai, and I feel like quite the woman sliding into bed – I smell soooooo good.

medicube PDRN Pink Peptide Serum | ExfoliKate Intensive Treatment | Clay Face Mask | HigherDOSE Dry Brush | Pure Radiance Foot Mask | Depology Serum-Infused Microdart Patches | Snail Mucin Sheet Mask | Dr. Teal’s Foaming Bath | PRDN Collagen Jelly Cream

Face Masks

I’m not the lady with 1/2 used face mask jars – I LOVE a mask. Gel, Clay, sheet masks – $2 or $200. I will put it on my face. I still love the Exfolikate “Hollywood’s 2 minute facial” (I’ll notice a distinct glow for 3 days) and recently have become a FULL CONVERT of all things Medicube or any Korean beauty products with good old-fashioned Salmon Sperm. I LOVE these PDRN masks (4 for $20, so more for special occasions), but for an everyday mask, this one is awesome and under a dollar a piece (also Korean PDRN). PDRN is basically salmon sperm DNA (I’m confused TBH) that helps you rejuvenate skin cells and promotes collagen reproduction. It’s both topical and internal. It’s no joke, and it’s absolutely noticeable. When I was first recommended it (like 8 months ago), I stockpiled it because I was so nervous that it was going to sell out (it’s oddly affordable). So now I have all of these and just smother the hell out of them on my face:

Allover Gel for Collage and Skin Barrier Hydration and PDRN Peptides for All Over Evenness (and Moisture and Plumpness, etc) – These were my gateway into it; I just couldn’t believe what a difference it made instantly in plumpness and firmness.
PDNR Jelly – I think it’s more expensive because it has more salmon sperm in it…(LOL). I got Jess and her friend in love with this one, too.

I don’t have any great nightly moisturizer right now, thus the amount of masks (I need recs for Korean PDNR moisturizer, not just jelly), but I’m trying Charlotte Tilbury’s “Magic Cream” because I had a sample pot and it feels really good. I also got a few solid recs from Natasha Glasgow, a clean beauty expert whom I follow and trust a lot because she doesn’t get paid by brands – FOLLOW HER. She told me about INNBEAUTY PROJECT Extreme Eye Cream, and I’ve been using it for 2 weeks and really love it (it’s so soft and creamy). Kaitlin also loves it:)

Hair Masks

For hair masks, I’ll try anything and do. I have famously dry, fine, curly, and porous hair (and I highlight it) – the real trifecta of “bad,” so I should be masking weekly. Here’s what I’ve been using in January:

Briogeo – I think the whole “Don’t Despair, Repair” slogan got me. Love it.
Kerastase – This is the one every hairstylist I’ve had recommends or sells at their salon. I use it and like it, but can’t tell a difference between the two masks, but trust them.

I just ordered this one because the reviews of it are so good. Listen, one time on a two-week shoot, my hairstylist ordered me to put normal conditioner on my hair, wrap it in Saran Wrap, and sleep on it. The next day it was the softest and silkiest it hasever been. So, again, I think if you have real damage, do some research to address your needs, but also, anything is better than nothing, and sometimes the cheap stuff really works in a pinch 🙂

I feel like I could keep going… But I’d really love to take a break and force you to witness my first nude photo shoot of 2026. I was so sick of shooting myself in front of my vanity putting on a cream, so we did this instead, and equal parts hilarity and regret. OK, other important things:

1. Get yourself a waterproof Kindle – I read self-improvement books as hard/softback so I can highlight and come back to them, but all my fiction is on Kindle. Then read my recs for romance novels and turn up that hand nozzle!
2. Light a candle – Duh. Again, most candles are created fairly equal to me. I love the viral Heirloom Tomato from Flamingo Estate and also any $8 fancy wannabe from Target (I stay away from anything too fruity).

Before we had a nice tub, I would put a stool next to our smaller tub and put an iPad on it, throw on Veronica Mars (back on Netflix!!), and sit in the tub for an hour. I’ve also been red-lighting it all over the place. The hat (for follicle regrowth), the face mask, and the blanket (yes, I’ve had partnerships in the past and am so grateful to use them). I’ve now gotten into the habit of daily use (4-5 times a week), which all the research says simply works. Red light stimulates collagen naturally and does a billion other good things.

I won’t bother to get into my supplement routine (I had to buy an XL weekly pill organizer). I’m tackling that heart inflammation in 2026, 13 huge pills at a time. I’m excited to get my second round of Function Health lab testing to see if any of it has actually worked…

Anyway, that turned into quite the rant. I stand by my thesis – Just like working out, any time you take for self-care is a net positive, a big “value add,” they say in business. If you have some solid recs, leave them in the comments. I love to try new things and am your #1 sucker for enthusiastic recommendations:)

*Photos by Kailtin Green

It happened slowly, then all at once. When we first revealed the pantry, we barely lived in the house, and I had no idea how much I’d cook or entertain here. Turns out it’s a lot (which is wonderful), and therefore the needs of “the hardest working room” expanded quickly (and messily). It is not only a dumping ground for school stuff (piles of notebooks) or hiding quick mess during parties, but Brian and I have become quite the collectors of counter appliances that we actually use. And while putting them on the stairs down to the basement seemed like a fine idea at first (“we barely use this!” we said), not when you actually use it 1-2 times a week. So slowly, I’ve removed the pretty things to make room for what we need – food, my ever-growing supplement library, and appliances.

Styled – 2023

When I saw this shot recently as the opener to a blog post about staying organized, even I was like, “Whoa, this is not a real person’s pantry”. But at the time (3 years ago), we didn’t have the inventory we have now. First, the tall oils needed a home, then the bags of vitamins, then the larger platters and bowls we pull out for most parties. Every few months, I would reorganize (always so messy) and take pretty but rarely used stuff out to the prop garage, making room for actual life.

Real Life – 2026

TOP SHELF: Let me walk you through the changes. Top left is random stuff (including some Brez, which I order online – a 2.5 mg THC drink that is a great weekend wine replacement and super light), then all my protein, creatine, and Gruns vitamins (spoiler, some kids love these, mine do not, but I like them). My slow cooker (love), and platters we pull for parties.
LOWER SHELF: Peanut butters/honey/syrup, dog treats, panini press (kids love these sandwiches), basket for some treats out of reach of kids. Then the air fryer (weeknight chicken strips), which we can plug in below and not even move it down, and the Instant Pot (weekly hard-boiled eggs).
COUNTER: We try to keep this as clear as possible. It has our house alarm keypad, a couple of cutting boards, our bread box (which indeed has our bagels and bread in it), and our $18 toaster that could probably use an upgrade, but we’ll use it til it breaks.

What We Didn’t Change: Three Years Ago

This wall has remained very similar to how we styled it originally, mostly because it’s a sightline that you see from entering the house and while in the kitchen, so it has to look really pretty, or it would bum me out on a daily basis. I love our decanted jars (and for the most part keep up with them). Naturally, the pretty apron and broom were crowded out by the one billion coats that you need in Oregon. Here’s what it looks like now:

I obviously needed a place for that incredible vintage still life painting of pears and figs (on that red and white tablecloth? SHUT UP). That pitcher full of pretty wood spoons is for my own visual pleasure, which I’m comfortable with admitting in public 🙂 I added more jars of decanted beans and lentils (hot tip: keep the bag folded up inside of it so you know what it is and how to make it), and then there are more bowls and cookbooks as I add to my collection.

This is the exact sight line from the kitchen door where almost everyone enters through our house, so while the walls on the left and right can be totally disgusting, the back wall has to remain clean and pretty (Or I need to put a door on this room, which is not on my five-year plan).

What About The Drawers??

These drawers look far more real than they did. I originally designed them to have that gap so that we could put potatoes and onions in them, or just have them easy to access. But it’s just bags of popcorn and chips. The gap doesn’t bother me, but would I do it again? Dunno. This is the first time I’ve thought about it 🙂

Coffee Bar Side – Styled 3 Years Ago

Now good news is that while I haven’t used one scoop of that fancy ass tea I bought to style out this shoot, this side is pretty much the same. Sure, we have more to-go coffees and the plant is now dead (RIP), but it’s almost exactly the same (sorry, we didn’t re-shoot it).

A quick shout-out to the hidden cheap microwave – if you are designing a kitchen soon, I highly suggest this instead of something more built-in. I’ve heard too many stories about the microwave breaking, and then what? This allows us to have a mediocre microwave that works just fine (mostly to reheat coffee and make popcorn).

While there are some rooms I do like to keep looking pretty, this one just stopped making sense, and once I started the transformation, I let her rip. It’s wildly more functional (especially using the appliances actually in the pantry and not even needing to bring them out). I suppose a door on this pantry would make a massive difference, but I know what would happen – I would use it even more as a dumping ground when people come over, a “don’t even look in here” room of shame. 🙂

*Photos by Kaitlin Green

When it comes to choosing permanent materials, I take my risks carefully. I have to really love the style or visual aesthetics of something to sacrifice function. Our kitchen island is the perfect example – would a big “engineered stone topped newly made cabinet island” function “better” than our all wood vintage store counter turned island? What we did was far more expensive, complicated to design (we added the overhang and had it stained to match), and yeah, the drawers are heavier and kinda stick. But this island brings me joy every day, and I’m honestly never annoyed at the wear and tear or the stickiness – I bought into those years ago, mentally. But not everything needs to be “the moment,” and if I’m not super passionate about something aesthetically, I err on the side of function/durability, easy to clean, cheaper, or simply “the easiest thing to do” (yes, designers make that choice ALL the time, too). Take our painted stairs for instance – not stunning, but totally good enough and saved us thousands from having to patch, stain, and repair the OG wood stairs that were in terrible condition that you can’t even notice through the paint. This brings me to the reclaimed wood walls in the guest cottage…

The wood paneling in the cottage is one of the things that I’m willing to spend more on to keep or even add to. The living/kitchen shared space is such a pretty wood on the walls and ceiling, with a lot of imperfections (as you can see) that will be stripped and sanded to be uniform, then we’ll figure out about staining/sealing it. We aren’t considering painting it. WE LOVE IT. The rooms that are already painted (the old prop room and the stairway/upstairs) will get repaired and painted (not stripped and stained). We are still figuring out flooring, so stay tuned on that.

Today’s discussion is trying to get vintage or reclaimed wood to match the OG bathroom wall.

The Guest Cottage “New Bathroom” Walls

That wall is so dang pretty. It’s 5″ tongue and groove (likely old-growth fir or some other softwood species), and while it has a ton of variation, I think once it gets some TLC, it would look pretty uniform. It’s exactly what I want. But it’s the only finished wall. The other three walls are exposed and need insulation, electrical, etc and then would need to get fresh paneling – vintage or new.

So the question became: Is it possible to match the OG paneling on that wall for the other three walls and the ceiling? Or is this a fool’s errand? Will it cost way more than a new simple tongue and groove? Or should we partner with Stuga and put drift on the walls like we did in my favorite room at the river house? I want to do the more interesting thing (and admittedly, new wood would be far less charming), but I also don’t want to negate common sense in order to do it (and we’ll have a lot of other bigger moments in here anyway – i.e., the much-debated “outhouse” and handmade tile by yours truly).

Let’s Talk Numbers: How Much Do We Really Need?

The existing paneled wall is about 153 ft² (minus the door, it’s about 135). If we’re able to match that wall and panel the remaining three sides, we’ll need about 380 ft² with overage. If we include the ceiling, we’ll need to add another 200 ft² to the order (plus a little overage). If we redo the entire room in inexpensive paneling or if we’re unable to match the existing and want to start over with all matching reclaimed, all in, we need roughly 735 ft² (so let’s call it 750ft²). So to recap, just the three walls and ceiling would be around 600ft², but the entire room and ceiling would be 750ft².

That’s a decent amount of square footage. We needed to do some research, so Brian and I went to McGee Salvage, which has the most in town. And the owner, Tobey, was WONDERFUL.

Tobey Parsons. I love nothing more than meeting people who have been specializing in something for decades and are simply a wealth of experience and knowledge. When we went, we were exploring reclaimed wood flooring for the entire downstairs. We honestly didn’t fine anything that made sense (yet) but still exploring it. We plan on painting the flooring a pattern (since the walls are all wood) so it stopped making sense for us to splurge on reclaimed wood flooring.

His inventory was vast and fairly intimidating, but so exciting. He had a lot, and everything had a story. But we weren’t sure if any would directly match the wall we wanted to keep.

The thing is, I don’t want the “reclaimed wood” wall – you know what I’m talking about (see below). I want it to be uniform and have a pretty smooth grain. I want what is similar to the kitchen/living room in the cottage. I don’t want it to be a mix of different tones and grayed-out woods that look more cobbled together.

What I Don’t Want:

Now, it’s not that I don’t like that look ever, but it’s just not what I’m drawn to for this project. To be honest, I don’t even need reclaimed wood to get what I want (which is just a pretty wood-clad room), but I think it’s a nice way to use what we have, and then yes, use what the earth already made. Reclaimed wood inherently has more character (especially old growth that has such pretty grains and ring patterns). Not to mention the good energy – if you are into that sort of thing (which I am). I want wood that has lived a happy life – either happily in a forest treated with love or a former barn where life was lived (which is why I bought all my wood flooring for our house from Zena Forest Products – which, wait, I just realized I should probably consider for this project!). That’s not to say that I won’t use new wood from Lowe’s where it makes sense (that’s what we did in the Art Barn and the garage), but I love anything that holds a story more, which should surprise no one. I’m not super freaky about it, don’t worry, but I’m telling you it makes a difference in how your home feels to have vintage or storied pieces and finishes. Ok, enough of the woo woo stuff!!! Back to wood!

There was some wood that I totally fell in love with, but not enough square footage to meet our needs (the one on the right was so pretty though!). Other wood we liked would need to be sanded and planed, which is something we are considering, but it adds to the cost. When we first went, we didn’t know that we needed either 600 or 750 square feet, so it was more of an information-gathering session.

We pulled together all of these boards, which we thought maybe we could clad and then stain the same, so they had a bit of uniformity (the grain was really pretty), and it’s still something we are considering.

In general, like everything in life, the stuff that I was more drawn to was the most expensive ($8-$10 per linear foot), which will certainly add up. But listen, drywall isn’t on the table here, so it’s either reclaimed or new wood, and no, I’d much rather this room be all wood than paneled and painted (which would be cheaper). I’m open to also just doing what we did in the garage and art barn (just pine tongue and groove), but that seems like the less interesting choice.

I’ve given Tobey (McGee Salvage) our quantities now and am hoping that he can sort through what he has and give us some options. And then I hope those options make sense financially. I’m open to splurging on the wood if it’s stunning, but not if it’s just “good”. One benefit of doing reclaimed is that I think that Brian and I could potentially clad it ourselves since reclaimed is more forgiving than newer paneling – it tends to already have awkward cuts and lots of nail/screw holes, so mistakes are easily camouflaged (I would imagine that Brian and I would specialize in those).

So as of now, I don’t have the exact options for you, but I am also curious if any of you had experience in this or sources that might have the uniform quantity that we want (that makes sense on the walls – not 2″ reclaimed old gym flooring). I just want to be inspired by the beauty of the wood, not “ok great, yeah we can see if we can make this work”. So while the uniform quantity is important, the richness of the grain and the tone of the wood are really important to me. Any insight or ideas are much appreciated.

If you like reading other people’s diaries, peeking into medicine cabinets, or just oddly curious about how other families and marriages really work (or don’t), you might be into today’s announcement – something we’ve been wanting to do for a year and a half. Brian has wanted to write more here for a while, about us, mid-life expectations (and disappointments), parenting, masculinity – literally all the challenges. Life as we experience it. I’ve also wanted to write more from the personal angle with a lot of “inside the business” stuff (I’ve got stories). But it’s all solidly non-design related, and at times this platform felt wrong for it, both in subject and in safety. And yet we have little embarrassment or shame around our failures or challenges (ask our friends), and Brian is a fantastic writer and sharer that I think a lot of you (or your partners) can connect to. So we are launching a personal Substack newsletter, which is a weekly paid newsletter that comes to your inbox, called “Brian and Em”. It will essentially be a landing place for a lot of the dangerously vulnerable posts that we don’t want to be so open for public consumption (and the potential backlash that can ensue). Posts that I have wanted to write here (or have already written), but have been too scared to push publish. I think about them, write, draft, edit, and they just sit in the back end waiting for “the right day”. This blog will remain 100% the same – I’m not going anywhere, and I’ll still write some personal posts here. These other posts will be both thoughtful and off the cuff. It will be all the stuff we talk to our friends about, just shared online with those who are into it.

Like What? What Will You Write About??

I figured a list of titles might better give you an example of where my head is. Here are some I’ve already finished or want to write:

1. How (and Why) We Made Our House Safe From Porn and Online Gambling to Protect Our Kids (I Had No Idea You Could Do This)
2. Why So Many Mormons Became Bloggers in the 2000’s (As a Former Mormon, I Have So Much Insight). Speaking of which…
3. Which of the Mormon Cultural Traditions My Own Family Has Adopted (Super Solid Ideas)
4. All the Times I’ve Listened to My Gut in Business, Where I’ve Been Dead Wrong, and What it Taught Me Instead
5. My Daughter Wants to be a YouTuber. Here’s How We Are Handling It
6. What We Are the Most Strict About in Our House (It’s Def Not How We Grew Up).
7. Small Business Stuff – My PTO Policy, Who Handles Our HR, and Do I Have a CFO??
8. Why We Didn’t Have a Third Kid (And Do I Regret Stopping at 2?)
9. How We Talk About Money with Our Kids (Oof, This is Like a 10-Part Series)

The list really goes on and on. Every day as I walk, I have new ideas, things that I think would be so fun to gab about, but don’t necessarily feel right here on the blog. Some are more long-winded (duh), and some are just thoughts, theories, or recommendations that I want to share, and I wonder if other people would connect with.

What About Brian? What Will He Write About?

This whole thing started because of him. He’s been working on a novel for a few years (and finished a creative writing program last year), and now that it’s done and he’s pitching it, he has a lot he wants to write, on the more personal side. I’ll brag for a bit, but he’s just really thoughtful, willing, curious, and open (not to mention the most supportive partner and father). Dax Shepher adjacent (he’s going to kill me for saying that, but if you listen to Armchair Expert, you know what I’m talking about). But putting it out there on a very widely read design blog felt off to him (since his posts were never design related and frankly some of his humor wasn’t that well received, even though I find him personally hilarious). You might remember his post documenting his vasectomy, or even how therapy changed his life. They will be more in that vein (LOL… no pun intended).

From Brian…

“Over the course of the Substack, I’ll be exploring things all sorts of men’s issues from my own personal stories. I’ll walk you through my journey with therapy and how it saved my marriage. I’ll answer questions like: How does it feel to be the husband of a breadwinner? How does being the lead parent affect my masculinity? Why do I still have a hard time talking to my wife about certain things? Why do I sometimes withhold affection? How do I raise a boy in today’s culture? Why am I still insecure about sex after all these years?”

He continues: “I also want this to be a dialogue, so I’ll be answering reader questions — well, ‘answering’ isn’t quite right. But if there’s anything you’ve been struggling with at home or in life, with your spouse or partner, I’ll give you my honest take from a male point of view. Kinda like Ask Amy, but with a jock strap. There will be blind spots— I’m just a middle-aged white dude after all. But hopefully, if I write personally and candidly enough, something universal will pop out that anyone could relate to.”

Obviously, we aren’t perfect nor experts in anything relational, but after 25 years together, we just feel really comfortable talking about stuff that most couples go through. Or maybe we are just indulgent know-it-alls and like to give advice ….

How Much Is it? How Does It Work?

The lowest you can charge is $5 a month (and then Substack takes a cut out of that, credit card fees, etc), so that is what we are starting with (it’s just us right now, so our overhead is just our time). For us, this provides a safety barrier, a buffer that keeps people invested in us and hate readers out (unless they pay). If you are a long-time reader and this is a barrier, please email hello@emilyhenderson.com, and I will give you 3 months for free. Right now, the post will land on Saturday or Sunday mornings in your inbox (which is when we read the Substacks we subscribe to). But anything can change based on learnings.

This is an experiment, something we’ve really wanted to try, but there are a lot of unknowns. At times, we think we could expand this into a podcast, and other times, we are nervous about exposing our marriage and inner thoughts to the public. We will protect our kids, obviously, and mostly write about common issues concerning raising kids, but not specifics about ours, in a way that we would regret later. Our phone and social media policy? Sure. How are we managing video game addiction tendencies? Yep. Because those are more universal problems. But nothing too personal about each one – it’s about us way more than them.

Brian wrote the first post that is a reflection on the therapy that changed his life and our marriage (and it’s not just normal talk therapy). Head over there for a 2-week free subscription and see what you think. Substack makes it super easy to cancel or you can opt in as a non-paying subscriber and get the emails (which will show you the first few paragraphs) and then upgrade to paid if a subject really compels you. Its juicy, but its not for everyone 🙂 And if you are a longtime reader and the $5 is a barrier let me know in the comments and i’ll reach out and figure out a way to gift it to you.

xx – Emily and Brian

*Photos by Kaitlin Green

Over the holidays, anything “non-urgent” got moved to the back burner (or just put in the freezer, out of sight/mind). So, outside of partnership deadlines and timely end of year admin, I let myself indulge in my family and totally forgot that I had this adorably run-down house that needed my attention. But I’m back and so excited to keep this project moving (but don’t worry, you haven’t missed anything since this post). Today I want to walk you through a few bathroom ideas I’m VERY excited by, that are more fantasy than practical. It’s a big room, 12×16, so it’s going to be perhaps an oddly large bathroom with vaulted ceilings…and a urinal. Just having the basics (toilet, sink, shower) felt dinky and weird. So I’ve got some fun guest cottage bathroom ideas, and I wanted to share them…

Hoping to keep the paneling on one wall and find reclaimed wood to go around the rest of the room. I need 600 square feet (3 walls and ceiling). I have the vision of it clear in my head, but it’s hard to explain. It’s going to be rustic (but cohesive), with a side of “summer camp” due to the amount of wood, but with a cohesive color palette and fun tile and fabric. More to come on the materials.

Ok, so since the room is big and has high ceilings, I want to divide it up and do a “room within the room”. And since I’ve promised Brian a urinal, I want to put that and the toilet in its own room. There are, I’m sure, many ways that I can do this, but I have two main ideas that I love almost equally.

Toilet Room Idea #1: The “Outhouse”

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Ok, so picture this – a small, roofed room inside the paneled bathroom. It would be almost free-standing (grounded against the back wall) with double doors going into it. It could be shaped like an outhouse (but stretched out wide, for double doors and to fit the urinal). I can 100% picture it, and I have zero doubts about this, as odd as the idea sounds. It could be paneled and painted so it fits in the same world but pops off the wood walls (which we hope to match and keep).

I was heavily inspired by this bathroom, below, with the tiled toilet room and shower.

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What a totally delightful (and ballsy) design. This designer put two tiled rooms (with glass blocks, no less!) inside what seems to be more of an old-world bathroom.

One room is for the toilet and one for the shower. Now, while a tiled version of my “outhouse” would be incredible, I think the tile budget might be totally out of control if we did this. But I think it’s the best representation of this out-of-the-box, fantastical idea. Well done, Buchanan Studio! When we first saw it a few years ago, our “Watercooler” Slack channel was a-BUZZ. I know it’s controversial, but we all thought it was just a totally fascinating idea, executed so well.

Toilet Room Idea #2 – The “Through A Secret Armoire”

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I mean, I’ve always wanted to do this (who hasn’t). You walk in, and it’s just an unsuspectingly large armoire (flat roof, not pitched), and then you open it, and it has a toilet and urinal. What a delight! The only caveat with this is that in order for the toilet to fit with the right clearances, it needs to be pretty deep, which, from the side, would give itself away (no armoire is that deep). Most of the ones that I’ve found online steal space from the adjoining room, which we don’t want to do here. So while this idea is a 12 on the fun scale, I fear that the execution of it is more challenging. Not only do I need to either find a massive, beautiful armoire, OR make one, but I need to build it out to be at least 4′ deep, and I think it would stick so far out that it would look dumb.

Our First Renders…

My team is having so much fun using Spoak, so we created some elevations here to show you. Now it’s rough, but it hopefully demonstrates what I’m talking about enough to visualize it and either agree with me or not. Depending on the size of the fixtures we go with (toilet, urinal, sink), we might not be able to bump the structure out from the side wall like this, but I like how it looks with some breathing room if the spacing works out. The sink would likely be vintage (and possibly wall hung), and the water heater location is still TBD (and would have to be small), but we wanted to account for it (it’d likely be hidden within a faux cabinet).

When I was in the space, I mocked up the depth of the outhouse to be a lot more, but now I’m realizing it could be a lot less deep (toilets are about 30″ and front clearance needs to be 15″). But you have to account for framing, so I think we are at least at 60″ from the wall. There are a lot of things to troubleshoot (and build), and this whole idea might not work. But picture this – you are over in our yard at a big outdoor party, and you are told the bathroom is through “that door over there”. Then, when you walk in, you see this quirky room that says “restroom” or “toilet room” on impossibly cute stained glass doors. Then you open them and inside is your own private toilet and urinal (might need to figure out a privacy situation for the stained glass doors, lol…). Maybe it’s a tiled wall inside (or the OG paneling). Maybe a little sconce, too. How cute does that sound???

And Where Does One Shower?

Ok, we’ve got our toilet/urinal and sink covered, so where should the shower go? And what does it look like? Now this might not be a heavily used shower (at least not for many years), so again we can be more creative with it. I had two ideas bouncing around…

The “Floating” Circular Shower Pan

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How fun is this?? I found this as I was researching how to do a shower without having to do all the hot mop shower pan waterproofing stuff (I was trying to avoid hiring out for that). What’s the least amount of “work” to get a shower without using a plastic insert (which I totally considered BTW and might be worth a blog post). So I found these images on Pinterest, which show exposed plumbing with shower curtains all the way around (no tile, no waterproofing walls) and what seems to be just a marble round shower pan on the floor (there are also cast iron claw foot versions). Now, would this possibly pass US bathroom code or inspections? I have no idea, but I’d bet not? But that didn’t stop me from spending no less than 5 hours planning out the bathroom with this in mind. Ultimately, I decided that future-proofing the bathroom by putting in a tub would be smart, which would shift this floating circular shower into the corner, in which case having it be round made less and less sense (I did find some corner quarter-round showers that were really fun, but started to feel a little too complicated).

Corner Shower With Chest Height Pony Wall

Ok then, I pivoted to doing a square or rectangular shower in the corner, but making it look more analog with a chest-height pony wall for privacy (and because I like the idea of a higher wall). And then above the wall, a super cute hanging curtain (almost like a cafe curtain, but that goes from the ceiling to the top of the pony wall), which gives me an opportunity to add a fun pattern/print and texture/softness. Fabric and tile are two of my favorite design elements, so I want to add them in as much as possible. I also love the idea of a column or some sort of decorative (and seemingly load-bearing) post or newel to add some architectural grounding (and for the paneling to butt into).

Here’s the birdseye view, which is not necessarily accurate yet but gives you a better idea of where everything is going to go. We might make the shower a rectangle, and we might do a floor-mounted faucet for the tub, etc (and pretend the sink inside the outhouse is a urinal). But I think it’s super helpful to see where we are headed.

Here’s where we left off. Since then, the framed floor has been started so that we can attach pipes to it for plumbing. But a lot left to consider:

1. Flooring – If all the walls and ceiling are wood paneling, then a tiled floor sure would be nice, but at 12×16, that’s a big floor, and tile is substantially more expensive to install than wood flooring. And we are planning on painting a pattern on the wood floor of the living/kitchen, so I don’t want to do the same in here, or it will be a circus house. We also might need to do under-floor heating in here, as we aren’t putting a Quilt mini split in this room. More to come.
2. Walls – So my goal is to find reclaimed wood that matches the tone of the wall that has beautiful existing paneling on it already (the wall where the outhouse would be). So far, I haven’t found it. It doesn’t need to be exact, and I don’t even mind if the width or profile is slightly different – it can look a bit hodgepodge, but I want the tone of the wood to be similar.
3. Windows – I think we are getting rid of the one on the far wall since it looks out to a fence and is frosted. I think we are going to put skylights in here anyway. We’ll keep the big picture window.
4. Framing – We have to frame the floor to be higher, so I’ll need to troubleshoot raising the door and creating some sort of step-up on the outside.

It’s pretty exciting, and now that my head is fully back on straight (dude, that holiday break killed me this year), I’m extremely excited to keep moving. Just need to get the plumber to respond to me 🙂

*Photos by Kailtin Green

Four years ago, I was struggling pretty hard, mentally. In short, I was telling myself a really terrible story about myself, living inside my failures, unable to really see anything positive I was doing (work-wise). This was around the time when TikTok disrupted media so much, dispersing the attention away from blogs and even IG (it’s shifted back, thank god), which affected all of our numbers drastically. So my reliance on social media had to increase. And listen, I’m extremely grateful for social media because it basically supports my team and my family, but living inside it can be super toxic if you aren’t mentally taking care of yourself, which apparently I wasn’t at the time. I constantly compared myself to others (my looks, my weight, my likes/views, my house, even just sheer volume of content I was able or unable to produce). I only saw myself falling short, looking old, and not performing at the level that others were. And then I shamed myself for caring about all of those things, knowing that I was also failing at being as evolved as I thought I was. And while I was proud of the boundaries that I had in place to protect my time with my kids (done by 5 pm, no weekend posting), it seemed as though restricting my social media usage wasn’t good for business. So I felt trapped – not wanting to sacrifice my time with my kids for something that I didn’t value, but fearful that if I didn’t, the business would dive off a cliff, and then what? While I never wanted to fully give up, I stopped saying yes to annual contracts or anything that would lock me in for more than a few months, giving myself the out if I needed it, or just a sabbatical to be able to rethink it all with a clear head. And then I would feel so much guilt and shame around that – to even think about giving up a career that provided so much autonomy, fun, and financial security felt like a slap in the face to everyone else stuck in jobs that they actively didn’t like. I still loved the work, and I adored my team, but I didn’t feel like I was good at parts of it anymore (mostly the social media part). I was just beating myself to a pulp. I worried severely that I was a relic from the past, totally irrelevant and not keeping up with the times (let alone the Joneses). I was really grateful for everything my career had given us, but I was so clouded by my negative self-talk that I was spiritually very sick. I needed a massive mental shift. Outwardly, I was still positive; only Brian and my closest friends knew I was struggling. It’s not that I thought my life sucked, just that I sucked. It was a genuine midlife career crisis, a spiral so long and deep that I didn’t know how to reset it on my own. 

For years, I had done a winter girls trip with my three best friends from childhood, but this year was a 911 for me. These are my soul sisters (so cheesy, but no other descriptors make sense). Thirty-five years of friendship, support, and deep spiritual connection. The four of us are open to anything (we’ve always incorporated some sort of spirituality in our weekends – sound baths, tarot, mediums, spiritual counselors, etc). So I pitched a “wellness resort” – Canyon Ranch in Tucson (I admittedly cringe at the word ‘wellness’ these days). My newly minted sister-in-law worked there at the time and could get us all 90% off with a friends and family discount. What was typically $1,200 per person, per day, would be $120 for us. Truly insane. The kicker? No alcohol. No sipping on wine. No end-of-day martinis. But it was planned for January when I don’t drink anyway, so we were like, yeah, let’s go for it. (Canyon Ranch now has some alcohol, but it’s restricted to just an hour happy hour.)

One of my best friends brought us all the book Super Attractor by Gabrielle Bernstein. Admittedly, it’s a TERRIBLE cover, but I was willing to do/read anything that might help (and honestly, sometimes the exact material doesn’t matter; it’s the act and dedication to the process that is effective). I dove headfirst into it, doing the work (mantras, journaling, dismantling my blockages, calling on my spiritual guide). I’m a good student, and while skeptical, I had had a few spiritual experiences in the past that changed my life/perspective, so this didn’t feel too foreign to me. And this 100% changed my life (again). I’ve read a lot of these books and they all circle the same things (The Four Agreements, Lacy Phillips’s How to Manifest and Many Lives, Many Masters also had massive impacts) but I think this one hit harder not just because of how she writes (which is friendly and entertaining) but because of this combination of the weekend – exercise, friends, sleep, time, nature, space. I also just started Tara Swart’s The Signs. Her first book The Source, was more about manifestation (she’s a neuroscientist), but this one is about talking to the other side, and it’s WILD.

We exercised 2-4 hours a day (including hiking), ate so healthily, slept so much, read, journaled and then verbally digested for hours with my best friends, who were reading the exact same book. 

It was an epiphany. I felt watered and fed on all levels, and I was bursting with new growth. I came back from that weekend bouncing off the walls, filled with so much love, not just from my friends and me, but from the universe/God. I know how that sounds, but there is no other way to say it. I was so positive, filled with lightness, I saw everything so differently, like I was literally wearing rose colored glasses. The same things that triggered me 6 days before, I now saw as a gift, an opportunity, a fun challenge. It wasn’t that “only” 60k people viewed my reel, it was “how lucky am I that 60k people viewed our reel”. 

Ladies, we can not make meaningful change without giving ourselves healthy time and space away from our triggers and chaos to dive into learning and growing. You can’t just “get better” or “figure things out,” especially if you are a working mom, which means you have two full-time jobs, ripped apart on a daily basis, desperate to be great at both, and likely beating yourself up for falling short at all. 

We went back three more times to Canyon Ranch (once just Brian and me) until my sister in law stopped working there. But I’ve now re-prioritized my girls’ weekends to be focused on feeling better (inside and out) instead of just “fun”. Life is just too short to come back needing to recover. Obviously, these weekends are very, very fun, too, just in a different way.

I’ve now been to 6 different “wellness resorts” (none as high-end as Canyon Ranch, but some even better in my opinion). If you are interested, I could review them all. It’s a bougie topic for sure (even having the time to get away is a privilege, let alone the budget) – so I want to make sure the appetite is there. I’ve even conducted 2 DIY retreats at Airbnbs when we wanted to save money and get a similar result. When the elements are there, you can kinda do it anywhere.

Now, not everyone is in the same life mind-frame, and this might just seem so boring to some. But it’s all I want to do now, I’ve consistently felt so much improvement in my mental and physical health after each one. If you are interested, I’ll review the resorts that I’ve been to (trust me, it was hard to find reviews online from people I trusted). None were sponsored or discounted; I don’t think I even posted organically while there. Just some middle-aged ladies taking a break from it all to connect with each other and our spirituality, workout, eat healthy foods, read, journal, sleep, spa like crazy, and come home like 40% better humans 🙂 

Growing up Mormon, you wear a CTR ring – a constant reminder to “Choose The Right”. As an adult non-Mormon, I actually really love this concept – just not with affiliation with any religion or even morality. CTR is the Mormon version of WWJD, which I also like – a symbol that reminds you to make good choices. But today I’m not talking about choosing “good” over “bad,” it’s choosing what makes me feel better when I’m stuck in a meh or sad mood (long dark wet winters here are challenging). Last April, I read something that was pretty life-altering (and almost stupid in its simplicity). It was by a famous happiness psychologist (sorry, I forget who) who defined their “key to feeling happy”. Listen, I’m wary like most people about privileged gurus telling others how they should be happier (*cough* myself included), but every now and again a nugget really hits, and then as a compulsive sharer I want to tell you. You see when I’m stressed, sad or in a negative loop, I can easily cope with not the healthiest things (french fries, wine, chocolate, holing myself up in the dark binging Love is Blind, avoiding everyone and everything, procrastinating in the name of “self care,” blah blah) and sometimes these are totally fine but those almost never contribute to me feeling better. And I know it. And then I get so mad at myself for not making a better choice, and thus the loop begins. It’s not always easy or natural for me; I have to force it, but when I do, it has always worked.

Here it is (don’t laugh): Step 1: Identify the things that make you feel good, and then, Step 2: Do them as often as possible. 

It sounds almost too easy. Now obviously there are a ton of things out of our control that deeply affect our individual “happiness” (including, you know, societal systems of oppression, health/marriage/money problems, daily dangers, childhood trauma, mental health, chronic disease/pain, the patriarchy) so this is not meant to fix any of those – it’s just about what we have in our power to control which is our perspective and mood. Coincidentally, I’m sure in a better position to tackle any larger problems or think bigger when I’m in a more positive mood. When I started doing this 2-step approach six months ago, it absolutely shifted my day (and life) a lot, and this next year I want to make a conscious effort to do it more (November/December is always a bit slippery for me, so it’s so nice to be back at it).

Now, we can all easily list stuff we “like to do,” stuff that is “fun” for us, or even our “favorite” things to do, but this list is different. It’s less “bottomless mimosa brunch” (which is fine!) and more about what makes you feel really good about yourself, both during and more importantly after you’ve done it. And the hope is that these little micro “goods” can add up to a better day (and then life). 

So in the name of internet self-indulgence, I figured I’d list mine for you: 

1. Long walks: with the pups, with kids, with close friends, or Brian talking through all problems or simply with a great podcast – weighted or not, nature or street. JUST WALK.
2. Engaging my kids by doing something they want to do: Doing a craft with Elliot and playing chess with Charlie (and no, I don’t always feel like it, but it always feels good after).
3. “Connecting” with Brian
4. Any date night conversation where we don’t talk about logistics (which helps with #3)
5. Making and eating a healthy soup or any Sunday meal prep (I’m always so proud of myself! And my week goes so much better) – always done with a podcast if kids aren’t helping. And so enjoyable.
6. Cleaning or organizing while listening to a gripping podcast (Can this be considered a “hobby”? But yes, I also use this to avoid other things, so I have to be careful here…)
7. Weeknight TV shows snuggled with my family: Watching something that we all love equally. Simple shared experiences with a lot of physical touch (right now it’s past seasons of Survivor – we are addicted!). No phones. No scrolling. Lots of snuggles.
8. Any exercise (duh): But doesn’t have to be Orange Theory (which works but oof). I love yoga, pilates, or my Peloton (specifically with Cody or Sam Yo), a quick HIIT training, or lifting weights with a podcast. 20 minutes does WONDERS.
9. Quick fun room makeovers for my friends and family (my fantasy job – such a win/win).
10. Cold plunging or sauna blanket (sorry, I still love it – always boosts my mood).
11. Any time in nature: Hiking, cross country, staring at waterfalls, just sitting amongst trees. Turns out I need trees to thrive, rain or shine.
12. Reading in bed with Charlie or “Girl talk” with Elliot: So easy to just put them to bed, but when we make the time to go up early and connect all our nervous systems calm down, and it’s a big love fest. 
13. Having “the hard conversation” (that are so easy to put off but you feel so good afterwards – JUST DO IT!!!)
14. Helping others: Decorating for people who need the help (probably my favorite part of my job, win/win). Hoping to do even more this year (including readers and more folks struggling).
15. Leading team meetings with clarity and organization because I was prepared (so easy for me to think I can wing it or that we are just a well-oiled machine that doesn’t need tending to).
16. Team retreats! (See above!) We all feel so excited and committed after a few days together.
17. Quick family game after dinner (sometimes it sounds like so much work TBH, but we never regret it).
18. Reading blog comments and responding (I feel so connected to you and my career more, I feel more part of this community, I’m reminded why I love being here, and feel so grateful instantly).
19. Having my family over for a big, fun meal (always chaotic, always fun): The six cousins together are so heartwarming – something we never had growing up.
20. Dancing (why don’t I do this more???)
21. Listening to musicals on full blast and singing super loud.
22. Journaling (with a heavy gratefulness practice – it absolutely shifts my day). 
23. Romance novels (or any gripping novel): also helps with #3. My recs HERE.
24. Reading or listening to anything by Brenne Brown, Esther Perel or Adam Grant – my heroes: I always feel empowered, seen, and just more ready to tackle my personal challenges after spending time with them.
25. Family dog walks (kids will complain, and yet we have the best conversations).
26. Hot bath with face/hair mask, herbal tea or coffee (rainy weekend mornings are the best, also helps with #3). Hot water releases oxytocin (I think all of the above do, actually).

It’s honestly a really fun exercise to list them all (and I also printed them out for my daily reference). Sure, many of these things I enjoy or don’t mind, but most of the time it’s about the good feelings that come afterwards – the dopamine, oxytocin, or just pride that I checked the box and made a good choice. Looking at the list, it’s clear that “connecting” is my vehicle towards feeling “better”. I feel the most “good” when I connect with my kids, my husband, my friends, my team, my pets, my family, my home, my health/body, and YOU. These things don’t deplete me; they just fill me up. If I know all of this, then why do I put them off? Why do I not bake 2-3 of these into my day every day??? They are all free, and many don’t require more than 20 minutes!

Actually doing them is often the barrier, right? And it’s not about “finding” the time, I know I have to carve it out. I have to get out of my seat and off my phone. So last year I started implementing Mel Robbins’ “Rocket” 5,4,3,2,1 method to actually get myself to do any of the above things on a daily basis. Now, TBH, I’m not a massive Mel fan (I don’t currently connect with her “tough love” borderline know-it-all personality, but I can take some of what she says and implement it in my own way), but boy does this work for me. You just stop putting off the thing you know you should do and count down like a rocket ship announcer, out loud, “FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!” and you MUST, like a rocket, get out of your chair and go do it. It’s so stupid! And yet it works! Brian has caught me multiple times chanting it to myself at my desk, then getting on my workout clothes and forcing a 20-minute Peloton. And then, you guessed it, I feel better. 

So my New Year’s resolution is to do more of the above (which has been pretty derailed since Thanksgiving). Choose connection and health over depletion, K, Emily? Instead of drinks with friends, offer a walk with friends. Instead of indulging in a reality show full of toxic ladies screaming at each other, get in the bath with a romance novel, then connect with Brian. No more end-of-night doom scrolling, comparing yourself to others, just cozy up with a book.

Identify what makes you feel good, and do it as often as possible.

I know that for me, this works. I’ve tested it so many times – and every time I feel better. No real problems will be solved, but I’m able to move through it feeling so much happier. Life can feel so heavy right now, and we have such little control. Letting the SAD overtake us helps no one (both seasonal as well as just the general existential anxious feeling that can easily permeate us all if we let it).

I would love, love, love to hear what the simple things are that make you feel good inside, what lifts you when you feel a bit down (or if you just want to feel EVEN better). Maybe for some of you it would be going out to dinner to a new place, heading to a museum and staring at art, doing a DIY while listening to music, or a weekend away from the city. Maybe it’s meditation and prayer. Maybe it’s just long dog snuggles in the middle of the day. Leave them in the comment section, and it can become a big repository, an inventory of “good things” for any of us when we need a new idea or a boost to feel better. Let’s hear it (and thanks so much for listening). Cheers to 2026 🙂

Opening Image Credit: Photo by Kailtin Green

I know that a lot of you might have some hours coming up, whether that’s traveling for the holidays or some much-needed time off! So here is my updated list of the best and most gripping podcasts I’ve listened to.

I listen to no less than 10 hours a week of podcasts, usually nearing 15 hours. It’s a real thing. Brian and I started listening to This American Life and Slate’s Political Gabfest in 2001, when we moved to New York for our subway commutes, when the internet was a tiny little baby. Point is – we are podcast enthusiasts, more than any other medium for sure (besides design blogs, of course). Now, I’m not sitting on my back porch staring at our flowers growing while listening, no, this is all while I’m doing something that was once menial, but with a podcast is now enjoyable. This is my dog walking and doing house chores time. The hobby turned into a real habit during lockdown when Brian and I would divide up the house on Sundays and clean for four hours straight, each taking a floor (the kids also did their chores and otherwise learned to not bug us). We actually came to love this time, and it was only in the last two months that we’ve hired a bi-weekly cleaning service again – not because we were self-righteously rejecting the help, but because we legit enjoyed our podcast time that much (and there is a lot of dopamine you get from completing housework).

But like all media right now, there is just SO MUCH OUT THERE. I rely heavily on friends’ recs and some help from my algorithm to find the best podcasts. I listen to almost every genre, but they all HAVE to be entertaining – whether it’s psychology, self-help, parenting, news, culture/society, true crime, or comedy. They HAVE to keep me entertained. This is why I feel like I’m a great resource here for today’s list, which is the best bingeable podcast series – i.e., the ones that you don’t want to stop listening to because you have to find out how it ends. Think “page-turners” and “unput-down-able” books. Today’s list will be less about single episodes (I’ll do that, too) and more 6-10 part series with a beginning and an end. Grab your laundry and a mop, because these will make your Sunday chores FLY BY.

The Classics – The Podcast Series That Made This Genre

I would be amiss not to go back in time for those of you who might have missed the podcast series that really made this form of media:

Serial, S-Town, Dr. Death, and Dirty John. Sometimes I want to listen to them again, almost like watching a classic movie. These totally transformed journalism and frankly gave hope to an industry that is increasingly being forced to chase headlines (to all of our demise).

Important Gripping Cultural Stories

These were mind-broadening and highly educational, and entertaining. These are the ones that you can’t stop talking about at dinner parties – big cultural stories/movements that make you smarter.

Rabbit Hole: A deep dive into how the Internet and social media radicalize people (specifically young men). Sounds boring, but totally gripping, I promise.

1619: A must listen to better understand Black American history. I learned so much. Extremely well produced with a momentum that drives, but with really good pacing (there is a whole episode about racial appropriation in Yacht Rock).

The Witchhunt of JK Rowling: Oof. Controversial and only one side. This documents the last 20 years of society, culture, social media, feminism, trans rights/backlash against trans rights, cancel culture, extreme religion, and even Harry Potter (??) As a curious person, I found it wild and prefer to listen and add it to a bank of information to help me form my opinions (that always remain open). I absolutely believe in trans rights and have so much compassion and love for any trans person trying to exist in this hard world.

Bone Valley: This bridges true crime and the justice system. It’s incredibly well-researched about someone wrongly fully convicted of a crime, serving decades, and how that even happened. It also goes into the childhood of the real killer, which I always find to be a fascinating layer.

Nice White Parents: About a public school in New York and how white liberals don’t necessarily always put their money where their mouth is when personally challenged. Definitely forced me to take a look at myself after this one. Nimbyism anyone?

Cover Story – Seed Monday: About two White Fish billionaires and a potential sex scandal. A large subplot about how the super-rich are changing Montana, not for the better, and the pushback they are getting from locals.

Cover Story – A Power Trip: Y’all, this made me absolutely question how we might potentially use psychedelic drugs for trauma and PTSD therapy. Shows you how any industry can be corrupted and we shouldn’t just take “data” at face value.

The Telepathy Tapes: Probably the most talked about amongst my mom friends. This one is about how non-verbal kids are telepathic and goes through lengths to prove it. I’m excited to see this in documentary form, as at times listening was slow, but my goodness, it’s compelling.

The Retrievals: Women’s pain has always been dismissed or not believed, especially around childbirth. Two seasons of the same theme, and while this sounds boring, it’s absolutely enraging. What some of these women went through and were gaslit that they weren’t in pain is horrifying (very well done and fully researched).

Sold A Story: I never finished this one, but it’s basically how a few people in higher education changed how kids learned to read. It was politicized by the left, and generations of kids suffered by not learning phonics. It has been mostly reversed, but just a reminder that both sides make huge mistakes in the name of pushing their agendas forward.

True Crime (More Gripping Than Scary)

I need to give a caveat here – I don’t listen to any podcasts that give me fear/anxiety around my kids (aka missing kids, mysterious accidents, etc), which there are a lot of. Most of the true-crime I love is more white collar, cult, or, sure, “creepy old murders” that feel far away from my own life. I also don’t love the one-offs as much as other people, but I also haven’t tried that hard.

To Live and Die in LA: Both seasons are so gripping and are about the mysterious disappearance of a woman in LA. And the publishing of these podcasts has led to information about who dunnit. Just excellently produced, and as you can imagine, it’s someone close to them (which always makes me feel better somehow).

Root of Evil: The history of the Black Dahlia murderer, as told by his relatives, who are younger journalists. This was fairly disturbing at times, but my goodness, it was excellent, and I couldn’t stop listening. They deep dive hard, and even after they prove the murderer, there is a follow-up episode that offers some hope and redemption re inherited trauma/abuse.

Your Own Backyard: This was a huge story when I was in college, so I was genuinely curious who did it. This podcast was so well researched with intrepid and relentless journalism that it actually helped bring justice. So good.

Looking For The Todt Family: Truly disturbing, but I couldn’t stop. This does have to do with kids, but the circumstances are so bizarre and family-related so for whatever reason, it didn’t give me anxiety (but totally creeped me out). Extremely unsettling (and generally not what I love).

Chameleon: Hollywood Con Queen: Not my favorite of them all, but a fun listen. Also, Wild Boys (second season) is really weird and good.

Harsh Reality: The Story of Miriam Rivera: Really sad.

Suspect: Mislaid justice via a Halloween party crime – it’s so good. (I haven’t listened to season 3 yet.)

The Preventionist: Brian and I just binged this in a car. A real “worst nightmare” case for parents about so many families ripped apart by doctors (from one particular hospital) who thought they were abusing their kids. No evidence. No investigation. And sometimes kept apart for YEARS. Let’s just say there are a lot of lawsuits happening right now, and I pray these families get some relief from the years of hell.

BETH’S DEAD: Ooooh, a real Nancy Drew mystery by two seasoned Podcasters – Monica Padman and Nobody is Listening, Right? I found this so gripping as it’s about a parasocial relationship from a listener (that ended up eventually shutting down their original popular podcast 10 years ago). A lot of twists and turns, and the unexpected ending was epic.

Noble: A weird case for sure. Hundreds of human bones were found in the woods, but no murder was committed. That’s all I’ll say.

Long Island Serial Killer: Terrifying but so well done. And just so shocking who it was and how long it went on for.

Betrayal/Double Lives/Scams/Cults, Etc.

The Shrink Next Door: LOVED. Kinda Stockholm syndrome-y, and dealing with Hamptons wealth culture (always a favorite). So good.

Sweet Bobby: I stopped this the first time around because I felt it was the usual catfish story (which, honestly, I find myself not really relating to). But out of desperation, I picked it back up, and then it blew my mind. There is a twist. Just wait for it.

Twin Flames: UGH, SO GOOD. This is about a self-help relationship cult and how they guided people to do disturbing things in the name of finding their true love.

Scamanda: A blogger who uses cancer to make money from followers. Oof. I don’t want to spoil it for you, but as a blogger, I was gripped.

Betrayal: Definitely made me start tracking Brian on “Find My Phone”. As someone who is currently happily married, it’s honestly so hard to believe when people say that they had NO IDEA about their partner’s double life, but the first season specifically feels so true, and I had such empathy for her. The second season is your worst nightmare as well!

Escaping NXIVM: Growing up religious, I have a real place in my heart for self-help or enlightenment cults. This is a good one.

OC Swingers: Exactly what you think it is, and then worse.

Queen of Con: Admittedly, I didn’t finish this yet because I had heard so much about the ending, but it was good and felt like it should be included here.

Something Was Wrong: I loved the first few seasons, then it fell off for me (now there are 17 seasons, so I’m sure there are some really good ones in there). But the first two follow specific relationships and how one person was unbelievably betrayed and manipulated.

The Teacher’s Pet: One of my favorites of the year. A cold case in Australia about a teacher whose wife went missing. A MUST LISTEN.

The Con: Kaitlyn’s Baby: Truly odd and unimaginable. Let’s just say it’s about a con regarding someone with the strangest addiction, and midwives were the victims.

Deep Dives Into Infamous News Stories

I love these because they confirm in my mind how much “growing the business” so fast is not always the healthiest choice, and how we in America push for MORE MORE MORE at all costs.

WeCrashed: Loved it. Just another story of a dude abusing his power with greed and narcissism.

The Dropout (and Bad Blood – I think I listened to both, strangely): You might know the story too well, but if you haven’t seen the documentary or the TV series, I loved this one.

Flipping The Bird: I mean, such a douche. It’s about Elon Musk, obviously, and his life and purchase of Twitter.

The Just Enough Family: SO GOOOOOOOOOD. It’s about a famous and rich New York family and how they reacted to and squandered their fortune. My old boss, Jonathan Adler, is on it a lot as he was great friends with Liz Lange, the heiress of the fortune. I signed up and paid for season 2 the second it was over (which I rarely do, and they still haven’t delivered).

What Podcasts Am I Missing???

I KNOW I’m forgetting so many – please leave them in the comments (for me, too!). And if you are into this, I’m SO happy to also do a list of my favorite one-off podcast episodes in all my favorite categories (self-improvement, parenting, relationship, science, work/business, etc). Leave your favorites in all categories below!!!

P.S. If you are in need of long-lasting headphones that stay in your ears, these are my all-time favorites. I don’t know how people do chores with AirPods in without falling out one million times a day, so I know that these look dorky, but I literally couldn’t care less – they stay in, the battery lasts for 5-6 hours straight, and they aren’t tiny, so they don’t get lost easily. Hot Tip: I only listen with one in at a time (especially while walking), so even when the battery wears out, I can just switch to the other side.

Opening Image Credits: Photos by Kaitlin Green | From: The Farmhouse Kitchen Reveal And All My Thoughts And Feelings About It

Wow. It was a HUGE year of room reveals, and looking back at it, I’m so impressed with my team for executing so many (and I’m realizing I’m already WAY behind for 2026). There are “renovation years” and “reveal years,” and I much prefer the reveal years (and so do you – or so traffic tells me). While some of us love getting into the granular construction stuff, it’s just not as visually pleasing as these styled-out rooms. So let’s recap it in chronological order.

The river house laundry room. Timed exactly for January when people need to stare at clean spaces and fantasize that their life, too, can be neat and tidy (it me!). Eventide is still one of my favorite paint colors – so soothing and fresh but with a lot of depth.

The river house closet. Closets are the only rooms that take ALLLLLL day to shoot. Like we can shoot a living room, dining room, and family room in the same time it takes to shoot one closet. Finding the angle, lighting everything since there is typically no natural light, and making sure nothing is reflected in mirrors.

And then the styling. OH BOY. I know that I’m a perfectionist when it comes to styling (not any other part of my life, BTW, which is weird), so these shots likely took 2-3 hours each to get perfect. This was for a partner, California Closets, so it’s literally my job to care to the extremes, so I do 🙂 And no, no one really lives like that. Technically, I didn’t design this closet, though. Emily and the California Closet Oregon team worked directly with Ken and Katie to design it. I just styled the hell out of it.

Ah, my laundry closet, which is painfully cute and gets so much use. This was my first DIY wallpaper job (pre-pasted FTW) and so satisfying. This is also where I revealed my love for “dumb” appliances (i.e., the Speed Queen that is historically the most long-lasting washer, that cleans the best despite looking so old school). She’s a solid appliance! I also love the little rope detail on the shelves.

Ugh. My best friend Robyn’s living and dining room was so special. It turned out so much better than I thought it would (not that I didn’t think it would be good, but I don’t know, it just came together at the end to be incredibly cozy, personal, and cohesive).

Every time I go over there, it’s perfectly clean and styled. They love it and have a lot of house pride and keep it almost exactly how we left it (table not set).

Such a pretty dining room. I’m so jealous of its coziness.

This guest bedroom in the river house was a sponsored room that I think took us a matter of days to concept and execute, and I think we really nailed it. I love designing bedrooms (despite not really dialing in mine yet!). And while tonal bedrooms aren’t for everyone, they are for me – it’s just really easy to execute, warm, and yet feels designed. Choose different hues and just layer, layer, layer.

Finally, my kids’ bath was completed with the addition of that wallpaper. I love it so much. It feels original, personal, unrepeatable, cohesive, and still me (and hopefully them?).

We also papered my water closet, which at first I was like “whoa, it’s a lot,” but quickly got used to and really like it.

The river house guest bath was a quick one, came together last, and is right off the pink bedroom above.

This was a bonus room of a friend of mine in LA who has an extremely eclectic style. She did the same Spoonflower pattern on every surface (and I had a partnership with Spoonflower at the time, so I convinced them to let me shoot it). Wild stuff and so fun (this hit with the younger crowd, but was controversial to a lot of readers).

My brother’s kitchen patio had to be shot in February to hit our early spring deadline, but we managed to get like 2 days of non-rain to do it. I love those swings so much.

My OTHER best friend’s living room is one of the most gorgeous rooms I’ve ever been in. I’m also jealous of this room and glad I get to stare at it in photos (and in person when I go over).

The dining nook is so special. I must use “Dead Salmon” somewhere in my life at some point (the Farrow & Ball paint color they chose).

We did a one-day styling situation in their basement using mostly what they had (I bought a few things like the sconces and the poufs), and it reminded me how much I love just coming in and solving other people’s problems.

Man, was it fun to have friends who were willing to invest in cool pieces and push it color-wise a bit. They are both creative execs and just love design, making them pretty much the ideal “client”.

Ah, the outdoor kitchen! Man, is it epic. It has four hanging copper lights now that didn’t make it in time for the shoot, and the landscaping has grown in so much. We are extremely pleased and grateful for this and have been enjoyed by, like, hundreds of neighbors.

The landscaping project with Dennis’ 7 Dees came and went in a blur (in the best of ways). They did such an incredible job, and it even looks pretty in the winter (less pretty due to the rain, mud, gray clouds all day lately, but still lots of green to keep it at least colorful).

My brother’s powder bath was just a little mini-reveal, but she’s pretty dang cute.

The studio/prop garage is absolutely life-changing for the Portland EHD team. It still gathers stuff, it’s still a place to pile props or returns after shoots, but it’s dry, no spiders (haha, I’m sure there are), warm, with proper lighting, so organizing things on a cold, wet day is still so pleasant. Thanks to my brother and Nick for executing this so perfectly!

And shout out to the prettiest garage doors ever. I know this seems odd, but we (and all our neighbors and friends) see these garages far more often than the front porch (below), based on how people enter the property, so having these look pretty actually made our curb appeal so much better.

The front porch is so pretty though, and I was so excited to finally get these big wides of the house. If you haven’t seen the before and after of the house and want the full tour, go check out this post.

And I think topping the “unrelatable home project” charts, we did in fact finish the pickleball court in time for summer, and we really love it. What once was a broken tennis court is now a pretty dang useful sports court. Let’s just say I’ll get mad at myself if we don’t have at least one huge party every month from April – September to enjoy the property. So come on over…

Mal really nailed her first reveal in her apartment, but spoiler! She is moving, and she’s going to document her new place as well (some for the blog, some for her channels). It turned out SO GREAT, and my 27-year-old self, who had nothing but mismatched thrifted furniture, was so jealous of her super dialed-in apartment. Seriously talented.

I mean, the most epic speakeasy… This went viral on her channel and for good reason.

Back to the river house, we started doing the bigger reveals of the first floor. We actually shot the living room, kitchen, dining room, office, etc, first, but we had to hold those reveals for the big house feature. So this family room was revealed first (and boy, do I love it). The coziest Bennet sectional FTW.

Mal then revealed her dining room in her Los Feliz apartment, which was so cute.

The foyer off the entry of the river house is one of my favorite vignettes. The contrast of the clean, round sofa against the busier striped warm wood just felt perfect.

The kitchen is such a dream to be in, cook in, and hang out in. We did an early Thanksgiving here with my family, and it flows so well.

Kinda crazy that someone actually gets to live here… 🙂

Then, in October, we headed out to The Carly to shoot round one of holiday content. Gretch produced it and did such a good job and styling that the space was such a dream. You can rent it for luxury group getaways (or small elopement weddings).

OK, so here is where we played sofa roulette, and yet we still don’t know where we are going to land! The Alice sofas in here looked great, but the color palette just didn’t feel like it was balanced. You all had opinions which I really, really love.

Then Jess won for “longest, best, and most personal makeover takeover“. We were all so smitten with how much love and thought she put into her apartment. Such an inspiration.

Stunning. Quiet. Personal. Interesting. I LOVE what she did in her apartment.

Back at the river house again, I got to finally reveal likely my favorite room – the game room (which might be more like a library). Def less “pop a shot” than “rummikub” but it’s just the best room to be in.

Gretch did a fantastic last-minute room change for a partner that turned out so cute in time for the holidays. That’s a sofabed!

Then the last river house reveal (for a while!), which I think turned out better than I imagined. Why am I so good at designing other people’s living rooms but struggling so much with my own???!!!! This one is so comfortable, cozy, warm, and yet big. The Baby Barb is Baby Barbing hard over there.

Kaitlin then tackled her bathrooms in her 1970s house that looked so good, so her and so appropriate. She doesn’t know which one she loves more – their bathroom (above) or her girls (below).

It’s hard not to vote for the girls because of that tile, but I loved how she combined her colors in ways that I hadn’t before. Bravo, Kaitlin!

Ok then, I played furniture rearrangement (with my sofa line, to shoot for marketing purposes) and turns out Brian and I both LOVED IT. Now that opinion was not universal, which I love. Many of you loved the below version better…

And I love this sectional and how the room is so simple and streamlined in this version, but with the Oregon mud/rain, I just don’t think we can have a sectional on the first floor (unless we get rid of our dogs). JUST JOKING.

You guys, it was a HUGE year, and perhaps my Q4 brain is done. I actually want to do more of a personal and business highlight post with some self-indulgent reflections :). Thanks for reading, as always. We appreciate the heck out of every day you come, read, comment, or engage. Thank you, thank you. xx